Ten interesting psychological studies that will help you go a long way from “first glance” to “grow old together.” What does every lover need to know? The role of a kiss in a relationship, why spouses become similar to each other over time, which kills relationships and much more. I have collected the most important and interesting 10 psychological studies that will help make your relationship trusting, harmonious and happy.
To love is not to look at each other, but to look together in one direction – Antoine de Saint-Exupery.
1. 1/5 second is enough to fall in love
Surprisingly, only 1/5 of a second is enough to fall in love with a person. During this time, hormones causing euphoria begin to be produced in the body when you look at the subject of adoration. 12 areas of our brain are responsible for this process.
The brain throws a whole cocktail of the so-called neurotransmitters into the blood: Oxytocin, Dopamine, Vasopressin and adrenaline when you look or just think about the same person. It turns out that the brain responds to â€śloveâ€ť in the same way as to a small dose of cocaine.
2. Love and sex drive are similar in nature
As shown by the results of research, â€śloveâ€ť and â€śsexual attractionâ€ť activate neural networks very similar to each other in the brain. These are the same areas that are responsible for emotions, motivation.
This discovery suggests that sexual desire is a little more than just a basic instinct, since it includes motivation and emotions.
3. A kiss helps make a choice
One of the criteria by which a person chooses a partner, as it turned out, is a kiss. According to the survey, women take the kiss more seriously than men and agree that this is an effective way to â€śtestâ€ť their new boyfriend.
A kiss is important not only at the very beginning of a relationship; it plays a big role in maintaining that relationship. According to studies, there is a definite relationship between the amount of kiss a long time living with each other people and the quality of their relationship.
4. After 25 years of marriage, couples become alike
It turns out that couples celebrating a silver wedding become similar not only to habits, but also externally. This effect occurs due to many factors that are similar for the two partners: the same nutrition, environment, a similar nature, or even because of a feeling of sympathy for your partner.
5. Relationships at a distance are possible
Contrary to common sense, the latest research has established the fact that long-distance relationships are indeed possible.
The people who managed to maintain a relationship at a distance were characterized by the following:
- mutual trust, allowing you to share the most intim secrets;
- idealization of the partner.
As a result, people separated by kilometers had the same level of satisfaction with their relationships as those in close proximity to each other.
6. Four things that will kill your relationship
Professor John Gottman has been researching family relationships for over 40 years. He watched couples for decades, trying to identify the same type of behavior in a pair that would indicate whether the couple would stay together or not.
In his study, he came to the conclusion that any relationship can destroy 4 things:
- constant criticism regarding the partner;
- contempt and sarcasm;
- permanent protection from a partner;
- contrasting himself with him.
7. Modern marriage = psychological self-realization
It is no secret that the institution of marriage has undergone significant changes in recent years.
Previously, marriage was associated with a sense of security and reliability, while at the moment, marriage is more of a psychological self-realization.
To a large extent, people see marriage as a way to fulfill their desires and to find themselves in this world. Unfortunately, often both partners, even realizing their own mistakes, do not pay enough attention to each other.
8. A surefire way to save a marriage
If you feel a lack of tenderness of love and care, then a joint solution to this problem can be watching a movie together. A recent study showed that the percentage of divorces can be halved, after watching some kind of melodrama, the spouses will discuss what they saw and exchange opinions about the characters.
9. Relationships after a divorce
With a divorce, especially in the presence of common children, relations between former spouses do not cease to exist.
Scientists say that relations between divorced people can develop in one of 5 ways:
- A broken duet where (usually) the father disappears.
- Good buddies where parents continue to be best friends.
- Colleagues who supporting each other, where former spouses go their own way, but support each other.
- Angry partners, where the fight continues after the divorce.
- Opponents, where children become pawns in the struggle between former spouses, and, as a result, suffer.
10. Important little things
We live in an extremely commercialized world, where the idea that everything can be bought and sold, even love, does not scare anyone. Everything has its own price – this is the dominant idea of today. But do not forget, trifles that seem unimportant at first glance, play the very first violin in the orchestra of family relations. The 4,000 Americans who took part in the amusing experiment confirmed this idea: a little attention and care will do more than you thought.
Bring a cup of hot tea to bed, take out the trash on time, or compliment the figure of your partner and you will see that such a seemingly trifle will work better and faster than chocolate or a bouquet of flowers.
Although, admit, neither chocolate, nor a bouquet will hurt the relationship!
Consider all the above tips and build the relationship of your dreams!